Most days just seem to feel completely overwhelming right now. Everyone is dealing with, well everything.
- Schedules, that are constantly changing
- What to do with the kids all day
- What to do this fall with school, sports, and other activities
- What about work, or job stability
- Questioning if you made or are making the right choice
When I started writing this post, I wanted to write about all of these, however, I would like to specifically address the stress associated with School. Right now, this is on the mind and heart of every mom and parent I know. Even us seasoned homeschoolers are debating what the future will be. I know that making the choice of what to do with your children’s school this fall is at the top of the list of anxiety right now.
I am sure that at some point in your day you look around and wonder what to do or how to do it and then spend the next week wondering if you have done the right thing? You have a hard time sleeping or concentrating because you are questioning yourself, all of the time. They say that worry is a moms best friend, and I’m starting to think that this is true.
In recent months most moms tend to spend their days continuously questioning and rethinking any of the choices that they have made. It is hard to know what to do next, especially when things are so uncertain and when everything changes. Things that should be simple and that we have always just done, are now up in the air.
Something as simple as school, has become a nightmare. Every family has different needs and no matter what you need, there seems to be a negativity, uncertainty, and fear. No one way will be amazing and no one way will be terrible, however, the mom shaming is out of control and everyone has an opinion about what is best.. As a mom, you know what your family needs in this situation and you should be able to make that choice with complete certainty. However, it seems like you can’t. Why? Well let's talk about it.
What should you do?
First- Put your family first, do things because they will benefit your family. Make a list of all of the positive and negative reasons for each of your options. Including fear. Many parents are leaving that off of the list because they do not want to admit that it is a problem. You have to be willing to admit it so that you can work through it.
List out all your options, with pros and cons. This list is going to be different for everyone, which is why you can’t compare yourself to others. You can't let people convince you that what you have chosen to do is wrong. Its not. They just simply need a different option for their family and that is ok, people don’t have to agree with what you are doing. You just have to know that it is right for you. Whatever you do, do NOT go on social media and ask for advice or scroll through pictures of the beautiful homeschool rooms. Make the choice based on what you and your husband have decided is right for your family.
Second- Think about why you are making your choices.
You need to ask yourself about the long term benefits of the choice that you are making. Will they be beneficial? Will they help you? Will your kids thrive with the choice that you have made? Does your spouse support you and will you work together? These are the questions that should affect what choices you should make. Not what people you don’t know on Facebook say.
You also need to ask yourself, if you make this choice, what will you be giving up? Will your job change or can you balance what you are doing. If you do leave your job, how will it affect finances. If you decide to go the traditional route, will you be OK with all of the new requirements and accommodations you will need to make for your family. Will you be able to handle last minute changes in schedules or family needs. Sadly, going to school is no longer that option where it is scheduled and reliable, because no one knows what could happen in the fall, winter, spring, or even the day that school is set to start.
Third - How will you be able to do it.
Sometimes it is easy to know what you want to do, however, it is harder to actually implement the steps to be able to. Goal setting is important. Writing things down is important because it helps you to see your long term goal and all of the steps you need to take to accomplish your long term goal.
Setting a plan is key to being able to be successful in your plans. It will help you to know what, how, and when to do it. It will also help you to be able to focus on the end result and motivate you to be able to keep going through the tough moments.
If you’ve been following along you will know that I am a big supporter of journaling. Especially for moms and for different reasons, this is one example where journaling will be a big help.
New to Journaling, if you’ve never done it you can read more about it here.
I know that whatever choice you make, you will put many sleepless nights into it. I know that you will worry until after school begins and even then you will question yourself. But you know what, that is what makes you a good mom. The fact that you want the best and struggle to know what that is. That is what makes you a great mom. Worrying and anxiety simply come with the job title. We all face it at different times and for different reasons. I know that you will make the best choice for you.
If you need help talking through this or anything that is keeping you up at night, click here to set up a free call to talk about it.
Don’t let anxiety get the best of you, a few small new habits can make you feel like a whole new person. If you would like a copy of my list of 10 ways to help with anxiety click here.