Find Self Love and Feel Less Judged with these 3 Steps
The way to true happiness is through acceptance of yourself. Be happy with who you are and what you have.
In this day and age it is very easy to compare yourself, your family, your style, your parenting, your beliefs to those of others. It is also easy to fall down the rabbit hole and start to question whether you or the things that you have are actually good enough.
To be truly content you need to be you and love you..
What do you mean by comparison?
This always starts out so simply and most of the time you may not realize what is going on.
Lets use a new house as an example. You have been dreaming of your new house and you plan and save and work and finally your day arrives. Your dreams come true and you purchase your new home. You innocently start scrolling pinterest and Instagram for decorating ideas. Then you start to think about how maybe your house is too small or your furniture is too old. Maybe you don’t have the perfect bathroom or not enough windows. You start to dream of what you are seeing instead of focusing on what you have and how wonderful it is. You begin to think that it’s ok, but… and now you want a bigger house or what someone else wants. You feel down the whole.
This also works with you as a mom. You want to be creative and more hands on with your kids. You realize that crafts may not be your forte but you want to be that mom that does the projects. So you go on pinterest and order all the supplies. Then you realize that the project isn’t what it looked like at all. You’re not having fun, your kids are being yelled at , and your house is a disaster. You take a minute scroll through Instagram, and there they all are those crafty moms with their cute big houses and art rooms… and you forget why you are doing what you are doing. See your kids had a great time with the mess and the fun, but you started to compare what was going on in some pics instead of what your kids were saying and doing. You fell down the whole again.
You are taking away your own joy by thinking those pics are real. They aren’t, they are staged.
You see how it happens, without you even thinking about it.
3 ways to help you not fall down the trap?
1- Find your self worth
Self worth comes from a place of accepting yourself, all of you, flaws and all. All of those imperfections that you like to focus on, those are the things that make you who you are. No one is perfect, no one is fully photo shopped. We all have good and bad. It is that combination that makes us us.
Find your focus to find your strength.
You have to find and focus on your strengths, the things that make you unique that no one else can bring to the table or do. Use your special skills, gifts, your unique ideas to accomplish what you need to do. You will never be able to do what others do, that is there thing. You have your own way of crafting, building, creating.
Use your talents to do the things that make you and your kids happy are what will make you feel fulfilled at the end of the day.
When you are able to focus and do those things that you are gifted in, you will begin to find your self worth and acknowledge your strengths. You will find your self worth by being you and not trying to be someone else.
2- Find your confidence in what you have achieved
Most days you can sit and look around and focus on what you have, what you have done, and how you use your talents. Or, you can scroll social media and focus on the accomplishments of others. You can see what they have or want to make you believe that you they have and start to doubt yourself.
When you choose to do this, you miss out on all of the wonderful things that you are blessed with. Maybe your house is smaller, but maybe it has more love in it. Maybe your vacations aren’t as glamorous, but maybe your family doesn’t fight through most of it.
The truth is you don’t know what has happened behind the scenes of those pictures. What you do know is what you have, what you have been blessed with, and what makes your family happy and proud to call you the momma.
A good way to help you do this is by using positive self talk. Read here to learn how to have a positive inner monologue.
3-Find joy in the gifts that God has given you
Have you heard that saying, the grass is always greener on the other side. Well, this is one of those situations where you should think about what that means. Are you finding your joy in the things that you have or are enjoying you looking for joy in the things that other people have?
Are you busy trying to have the life that someone else has instead of enjoying the blessings that you have in your life.
Do what will make you happy
It is vital for you, your mental health, and your overall happiness to stop looking at what others have or have accomplished. You need to focus on you and your family. Focus on the blessings that you have, the blessings that God has given you. They may not be perfect, however, if you learn to enjoy them and find the joy in them, your happiness will grow. Your gratefulness will grow and your confidence will grow.
You will become the you that you should be. The you that is amazingly wonderful with what you have, good and bad. Love yourself and build your confidence so that you may find your true happiness.
Learning to love yourself is vital in your role as a mother and a woman. Read here for more tips on building your self confidence.
There is no need to compare yourself to anyone else. God made you special with amazing gifts and talents. Your children truly think you are amazing and feel protected and loved whenever you are around. You run your household perfectly for what your family needs. At night when you are up trying to catch a few minutes of quiet, your family sleeps because they know that you have made their home warm, safe, and perfect.
Love yourself and stop feeling judged.
You are amazing!
If you need more help with this or want to talk about how to find your self confidence, set up a FREE CALL here to get started.
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